he goes in this courtyard, walks around comes back in like 6:00 in the morning. Jimmy Kimmel Liveairs every weeknight at 11:35 p.m. EDT and features a diverse lineup of guests that include celebrities, athletes, musical acts, comedians and human-interest subjects, along with comedy bits and a house band. it can make your kids sick. and you. [ laughter ] but no, actually, it was so great. [ laughter ] >> you and me both, man. [ laughter ] the guy would look at me like, "you go home." people are like, who is she? because what is this if not pure unbridled passion? >> jimmy: yes. [gasp] just like the psycic said! >> people can come to that. [ laughter ] in the chocolate. >> lou: "jimmy kimmel live" concert series is presented by the s-class from mercedes-benz. Jimmy Kimmel Live! apparently you guys worked together a long time ago. estado dorado. Later, we talked about Kimmels recent April Fools prank, in which he swapped studios for a night with Tonight Show host Jimmy Fallon. >> jimmy: yeah. Tonight, December 11 2022 & This Weeks Schedule Lineup. >> on the third night i remember the shaman had a bottle of tobacco water and did this thing where he went whoop! >> i had no clue. [ laughter ] i was out at dinner with my friends. [ laughter ] one of the pieces of "evidence" the conspiracy theorists are passing around is a video of will smith teaching a kid -- he was doing some kind of event -- he brought a kid up onto the, stage to teach him a slap, and the kid, believe it or not, is named "chris." call or click to get a quote today. >> what's that mean? (typing) th(toddler laughs). like -- so we get in the car we're driving by this building sunset. his new album "mainstream sellout" is available now. [ laughter ] trump was like, "here's the keys to the oval office. we freak out. they say cantwell tried to drive away with it saying he was a federal marshal, claiming the dealership stole the car. marcus scribner. >> jimmy: well, "atlanta" is great. >> yeah, they definitely do. like drunk-driving their atvs into the swamp? [ applause ] donald glover is here. please welcome donald glover. >> jimmy: i just like to see what's going on. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: this bunny, where is he from? >> jimmy: that will be a good paperback story for sure. i like to blossom and then go away. >> i really don't believe it happened. on the Internet. thank you, guys. a lot of information that i didn't need." [ laughter ] roughly $730,000? maybe one with blisters this time. >> we got homes for most of them. you did well. advantage! >> yeah. we have music from stromae. and you're working on another landau project for disney plus right now. i'm 53, but in my mind i'm still 35. that's why i take osteo bi-flex, to keep me moving the way i was made to. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: not jesus, he's coming back sunday. even when you're not at home. much i lost in that contentious divorce oh that bitch >> starring george takei as william shatner in space. kevin hart alone sells out the grand canyon. >> we actually have different things and this is not something i thought was going to be around, this is something that's in florida and other schools for very young kids, the gender-bred man, this is trying to sow doubt about kid's gender identity to say they can be whatever they want to be, this is inappropriate. and i thought this was interesting. i'm 53, but in my mind i'm still 35. that's why i take osteo bi-flex, to keep me moving the way i was made to. shining like gold. you and pete were friends for a long time, right? he's bragging about the dudes he knows. a subaru with eyesight (kid vo) hey dad! >> jimmy: you have? >> quite an honor, quite an honor. [ laughter ] "it took place at trump international golf club in west palm beach on the 7th hole, which was playing 181-yards into a slight wind. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: anthony, i know i'm, getting ahead of myself but i hope that barry does what "breaking bad" did and gives noho hank his own series after the show is over. i'm so high oh my oh my . Kaley Cuoco ( The Flight its energy, that's good. on time? younger zoe: what are you guys eating? toyota. >> yeah, you do that. (music throughout) new starbucks baya energy drink. we were out having a great time. because otherwise there would only be three things in the book. [ laughter ] i don't know. [ laughter ] but really, it would have turned your stomach to hear the conversations. >> jimmy: how do you call lil wayne and ask him? one of those. available at your local cook it up, stretch it out. Happy Birthday: Take a front-row seat and make the most of whatever situation you find yourself in this year. [ laughter ] this is interesting. [ laughter ] it's regular, everyday criminals too. [ laughter ] so may the lord have mercy on these reviewers, they know not what they do. >> good evening. alright! if that isn't god telling you not to throw your hat in the ring, i don't know what is. which is about 80 bucks. so we hid a comforting brownie in a snickers. >> well one time, this was the closest, it was an emotional attack. >> we would want them to look at the circumstance through the eyes of the victim and not just through the eyes of the officer. >> this beef or ham? >> can i get a picture with you? >> are you referencing the rush song? this is a tough mob? >> yeah. second night she was like, i don't ever want to see that again. was that me? any ideas for new members? season 2022 episodes. don't just stand there like a spare prick at a wedding. >> uh -- i don't know. >> oh, i know. [ cheers and applause ] thank you. now it's dangerous. younger zoe: (chewing sounds) younger zoe: i love lasagna, that's you guys. this was 8:00. he pulls up around 1:00 a.m. [ laughter ] the sprinter is there. >> but if you keep everything at a 2, when you do a 10 it feels like 100. so just keep it low-key. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: yeah, makes sense. >> the easter bunny is -- like a little bunny, that he goes around and hides eggs. we got to tie these shows together. sharknato? toorrow night, chris pine and ke huy quan, with music from wallows. last month when trump called in, after he palled putin smart, hannity asked him, "you recognize he is evil, do you not?" [ laughter ] >> make the prices cheaper for when we take pictures for you, it's like $40 when we have to take pictures at the mall. >> who is the easter bunny? Watch these epic moments of some A-list guests who took part in the game. >> that's the biggest deal. The fact that they only from ihop. his girlfriend accused of pushing him to it. [ laughter ] man, i don't even, they're so corny. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: where did you watch the oscars? of course, your book, "comedy comedy comedy drama" which leading up to the heart attack -- this was printed before it happened, y. maybe the magic of cgi will make me look like the same guy. he stands up and i can tell at that point he's had a couple to drink. [ laughter ] trump headlined a rally in georgia this weekend that was not well attended. Through the summer, Kimmel decided to take a big chunk of time off, which means the show has been hosted by a series of guests since June 20, with some reportedly yet to come like Byer, Simu Liu, and Jeff Goldblum. >> jimmy: thank you, guillermo. [ cheers ] anthony anderson and tracee ellis ross will be with us following the series finale of "black-ish" -- "black-ish" is over next week. Guests. set my alarm, 8:30. dude, lil wayne didn't cut a song. oh, i'm making this, i'm painting, i'm just -- >> jimmy: daddy's at the farm, kids. he has a concert in boston tomorrow. >> the greatest show in the galaxy is america's baldest billionaire, tony award winner jason alexander is -- i'm jeffrey bez zes and my life is a-maze-os >> experience the amazon's founder's incredible life journey from his childhood. i think it was more of a staged act. redefine who we are and how we want to lead our lives. it's a fork. we have ukraine, wouldn't have happened. whew! this way for a long time, you know. i mumble a lot but i feel that's the way a lot of people talk. all the actors were so great. and he's just like, "i want to thank you so much." one bank that puts you in control. and now, jimmy kimmel! they've been planning this since chris rock was a child! >> yeah. [ laughter ] maybe he just -- maybe he thinks -- and i was like, "well, i'm anthony." and from that point on it's like a tractor beam, you know? a troubled massachusetts teen dies by suicide. >> he's like, i didn't make you wait too long, did i? Season 2022 guide for Jimmy Kimmel Live! [ laughter ] >> jimmy: no. some of the dummies who stormed the capitol on january 6th are saying they did it because it was a "presidential order." [ cheers ] >> jimmy: hold on a second. >> jimmy: had i won this election that i won. "ellen goes to dinner." and congratulations. >> my middle child says daddy looks weird. you know, he recognizes me. >> the only thing in my mind was, i hope they don't shoot me. they're like, do you want a stylist? [ laughter ] >> jimmy: what is the deal with him and the windmills? i have to tell you, the first episode of the season, i have to hand it to fx for letting this happen because you're barely in the first episode, you're at the end. >> jimmy: you recovered, thank god. >> he drives with the tooth fairy. now get $30 off over 3 months. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: uh-huh? it's far. own personal hell, did you have that same experience? i was told this book had all the answers, and yet i still don't know who killed my dog." "brother solomon." and his book "comedy comedy comedy drama." major moments, like this announcement from actress and former kanye girlfriend, julia fox. A change will tempt you, but uncertainty will hold you back. here with the song "fils de joie," stromae! raise my kids? i wonder if he even knows what nato stands for? >> so i don't have any official comment from the white house on the altercation, i know the president was not able to watch the oscars. many people. "hookers? donald trump is doing a lot of interviews. no one was asking about this. for surprisingly great rates that fit any budget like a good neighbor, state farm is there. call or click to get a quote today. he was just building up his courage to shoot his shot, you know? we humble a lot. we don't hear from you in two hours, we'll all take cyanide pills. and the most unfortunate part of all of this, is that a lot of history was made on sunday. truth is, we were going to do it anyhow. add downy to your wash. for all the freshness and softness of home. we'll be right back. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: that is donald glover and friends on "atlanta" which is on fx and the next day on hulu. [ laughter ] not that we've stopped talking about it. ET; ok. ok. have you tried crunching? [ laughter ] then i came out and have been like this ever since. i hate myself. tv Jimmy Kimmel Live ABC April 1, 2022 11:35pm-12:27am PDT . [ cheers and applause ] here with us. Uploaded by Pandora The World of Avatar Banshee Loungefly Backpack, "Jimmy Kimmel Live" Guest List: Bill Hader, Rebel Wilson and, "Jimmy Kimmel Live" Guest List: David Duchovny, Donald, "Jimmy Kimmel Live" Guest List: Keanu Reeves, Judd Apatow, "Jimmy Kimmel Live" Guest List: Jessica Biel, Zac Efron and, Jimmy Kimmel Live Guest List: Jake Gyllenhaal, The Kardashians and More to Appear Week of April 4th, New Episodes Every Wednesday House of Mouse Headlines Presented by Laughing Place. yeah. >> yeah. so you're getting rid of all your workout gear? i literally lay in bed at night listening to my heart. that's why i only date musicians. >> jimmy: uh-huh? Dec 2nd, 2022. tv Jimmy Kimmel Live ABC April 8, 2022 11:35pm-12:37am PDT . so i do block off, you know, time. [ laughter ] story to wake you. earning pancoins toward free food. >> that's great. >> i have to be honest, i didn't listen -- i got really into the beatles, i'm being serious, like a year ago. [ cheers and applause ] i see it on the billboards. >> jimmy: and speaking of the early years, the hard times, you at one time did -- it was like a training video for the old country buffet? Following are the episodes scheduled to air she did, like, tina turner and i was emceeing in awe. and, it restores by helping heal gums in as little as 7 days. they're supposed to put an arcane that over you, essentially a shield, energy shield, over the whole experience. >> i keep looking at the red light. >> i think in 100 years, people are going to look back, and they're going do say, how did we stand back and nato stand back, in many ways i've called a paper tiger, don't forget i rebuilt nato. i'm father jimmy. he had to back out when they changed the date. "let's go to prison." >> say something to me. i get a lot of, like, you know, "hey, man," you know. [ laughter and applause ] the other wacky line of questioning is from those who think it was fake. J immy Kimmel Live and The Tonight' Show starring Jimmy Fallon have been the staples of late nighttelevision in New York and Los Angeles for many years. >> jimmy: and the rhythm of the show is addictive, very low-key. she has no idea tracee ellis ross. [ laughter ] he's ready to plead the fifth about the 6th. >> jimmy: well, thank you very much, and it's great to have you here. [ laughter ] and -- yeah. This week Jimmy Kimmel Live! you know, we've done such a good job, jimmy, of keeping secrets on the show. Guests Get Paid on Jimmy Kimmel Show 2022: Jimmy Kimmels guest receives payment for appearing on his show. older zoe: you know what, can you? >> that was just something that happened. The show is in its 20th season and currently broadcasts from the iconic El Capitan Entertainment Centre on Hollywood Boulevard. people don't think the slap was real because starting in the '60s, most fight scenes on network television looked like this. do you believe in magic in a young girl's heart how the music can free her whenever it starts and it's magic do you believe in magic . click or call for a quote today. web pages Kimmels recent guest hosts, who stepped in after the host tested positive for COVID-19, included Mike Birbiglia and the duo of John Mulaney and Andy Samberg. following bob odenkirk's footsteps would be pretty sweet. logan says, "not what i was expecting." that seeps like a lot. >> jimmy: yeah. the launch is now scheduled for thursday. his album is called "multitude." >> yeah. >> jimmy: no, can you tell us us what that means? we discover exciting new technologies. By Ashabi Azeez Apr. they're killing the bald eagle and other eagles and other birds. >> jimmy: yeah. The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon. [ laughter ] holy thursday, for christians, commemorates the last supper. we went to in-n-out with my, daughter, that's her uncle, we went out. >> this is not a homicide. >> jimmy: this is something you wanted to do. >> jimmy: later you had an animated conversation with her. we saw a couple in the car right there, the girl was freaking out, oh my god, that's pete davidson and mgk! [ laughter ] donald trump, surprisingly, has not weighed in on the oscars. let's make a toast to doing more this spring. i think you'll enjoy this. >> jimmy: you know she's not here right now? people will say 'that catch' was a total fluke. we'll be back with machine gun kelly! [ laughter ] >> jimmy: it was announced over the weekend that bryan and aaron paul will be in this season of "better call saul." state farm has options to personalize your policies, so you get a rate that fits your budget. now you have two more delicious reasons to do your thing this spring. [ laughter ] meanwhile, donald trump is bored. vine. [ laughter ] by the way, i looked it up. >> jimmy: you don't have a rectangle butt? on the web atabc.comand atyoutube/JimmyKimmelLive. >> i was the vanity fair oscar party. start conversations with children by saying something like this. yesterday he extended the covid national emergency declaration for another 90 days. i tell them, it may be your detergent that's why more dishwasher brands recommend cascade platinum with the soaking, scrubbing and rinsing built right in. >> jimmy: i don't think people realize, they can come to that. and we never went on another date. for the past i'm not sure how long, people have been making a lot of money selling nfts. would you like to see it? [ laughter ] or don't, it's absolutely terrifying. and thinking about all the people who responded when they heard this happened. get a free samsung galaxy s22 with any galaxy trade-in. [ laughter ] good news, god, you got five stars! is that something that the white house condones, that type of violence, do you condemn it? >> yes. Terms of Service (last updated 12/31/2014). all the time you need. >> jimmy: the only thing that flows is snot. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: we have a video of this wall on sunset boulevard. maybe i dated her for like two weeks, it was maybe a third date, maybe second. >> wait, what? This coming week, audiences will enjoy appearances by celebrity actors and a reality show contestant, along with a variety of musical guests. the great donald glover, everybody. i don't think they know what's in my mouth. agm are the only bathroom renovation specialists i recommend. younger zoe: cosmically, no. [ cheers and applause ] >> trying to win an emmy for this. it's one of the new characters i'm testing out. it was interesting. well, some people, rather than stealing it from a motel room, like normal people do, buy it on amazon. verifying he was a federal marshal and he told the president trump enacted martial law. [ cheers and applause ] >> yeah. >> jimmy: nice. crunching made me ceo of this desk. no second date, you end up alone. years. This coming week, audiences will enjoy appearances by celebrity actors and a reality show contestant, along with a variety of musical guests. this neck pillow i'm dating says great things! i want it all to come out at the same time. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: you and your lovely fiance megan fox -- >> yeah. >> how's that for you? [ laughter ] and then eventually, like, my friends who were on stage with me performing go, "hey, lady, you got to stop, you got to get out of here." all electric, all mercedes. >> daddy's at the farm, leave him alone. [ laughter ] this is from bradley. it nourishes and strengthens my joints for the long term. new revelations as the alleged new york city subway shooter appears for the first time in court. did you just call me, stanimal? [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: how you doing? exclusively at the home depot. we could walk forever ( ) walking on walking on the moon some may say i'm wishing my days away no way walking on the moon , in the jungle where only a few will go in the jungle in the jungle [crunch] mr. clarke your daughter is a very good kisser when you crave the uncomfortable, try new spicy pringles scorchin'. they are now on a "stop list," which means they cannot travel to russia. >> jimmy: was it risky? >> anything you want to do that's your dream project? we did run out of time for him. >> what grade are you in at school? >> jimmy: this is the first time you've been on the couch as they say, welcome. it was a great time, the whole thing was great. >> from easter island. >> you can see it right now! >> jimmy: you've both seen me naked. >> that's great, thank you. ukraine situation with russia. never heard of them." president biden is planning to spend his holiday weekend at camp david. Every weeknight, comedian Jimmy Kimmel entertains audiences across the nation with his wit and fun take on the world at large. Nov 23rd, 2022. >> i'm sick and tired of them wanting to teach ctr in school, critical race theory, can you tell me what that mean? Jimmy Kimmel has a schedule stacked with A-listers this week. a lot of folks ask me why their dishwasher with caffeine naturally found in coffee fruit. and it's not just the storm-trumpers who've been taking orders from emperor palpatan. [ laughter ] >> yeah, just sorrow. and then our cast became such good friends, ray sehorn, patrick fabian, michael, tony, carlo. i don't know if you know that. >> he paints all the eggs the chicks make. and i don't know, when i read the role i just saw it as kind of -- i don't know, i just saw him as this really bright and sunny and cheery kind of guy who. turns out they only use that name behind stan's back. >> initially what they based the character on was actually -- like you know those geniuses at an apple bar? i'm oddly on there smoking the fattest blunt. he walks out, he comes in, says what's up to everybody. russia yesterday, as payback for all the sanctions we've put on them, announced permanent sanctions against 398 members of congress. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: you can count on lil. it's this story based on a true story which i remember this harrowing story about this kid. >> you should never greet guests by saying something like this. if ever there was a year to really hide the crap out of those eggs, this is the one. "nightline" is next, but first, his album is called "mainstream sellout." Wednesday, April 13 Bill Maher, Michelle Yeoh, Alec Benjamin. tv Jimmy Kimmel Live ABC April 14, 2022 11:35pm-12:37am PDT . >> jimmy: "makeup sex," the album is called "main stream sellout" right back with music from machine gun kelly! >> here at the old country buffet, every conversation you hold with a guest should begin something like this. Jimmy Kimmel Live airs every weeknight at 11:35 p.m. EDT and features a diverse lineup of guests that include celebrities, athletes, musical acts, comedians and human-interest [ laughter ] right now's the start of another. now i assume you get recognized all the time? Jimmy Kimmel Live Schedule for the Week of 4/25/2022. on the web atabc.comand atyoutube/JimmyKimmelLive. actually, let's make two. >> jimmy: seems like you can do anything you want. Search the history of over 766 billion because the best things in life don't cost a fortune. >> jimmy: this is like a disney movie that happened during the f filming. jay-z, kendrick lamar and anybody you could think of. panera chefs have crafted a masterpiece succulent, seared chicken a secret aioli clean ingredients in a buttery brioche roll. why not? i play the song, he's like, this is what we're doing? TV Archive >> jimmy: where you, after bryan cranston moved, you lived in his place? >> jimmy: no, that's not her. [ applause ] hey, by the way, be careful on easter. Beginning Monday, April 11- Friday, April 15, tune in at 11:30 pm on ABC 4 West Michigan to catch engaging interviews, hilarious skits and live entertainment. Its a classic radio-style bit, we have a song called "a." the only thing between you and a life-changing accident. we call. >> jimmy: i'm very excited. his people claim about 30,000 supporters showed up. are you ready to die? >> jimmy: yeah, boy, i would just never do that. kimmel live" brought to you by ihop's new reward program, the international bank of pancakes. 11:35 pm welcome back, everybody. big wheels keep on i'm like, "what'd they do? social media is a place of poison and evidently. and that got me thinking about the bunny. By Randy Holmes/Getty Images. >> we've heard that you might be the easter bunny, can you confirm or deny this? [ laughter ], she did not come tonight. >> no. this one is for all the marbles. tools that help protect. they say they got some bad buttermilk. and i had to watch it because i don't have any memory of this incident or the ext eight days. [ laughter ] i feel bad for the auctioneer who had to work his way down from $48 million. i was really waiting for the jesus to die part, but it was kind of anti-climactic. there's juice boxes for don jr. and eric. that's why i invest all my money in chuck e. cheese tokens. feel the difference with downy. which, in his defense, how was he supposed to know a screen grab of a tweet wasn't going to be worth $48 million? but they had to postpone it again. >> that's nice you say. >> lou: here's what's poppin' next week on "jimmy kimmel live!" but patrick and i left for the weekend, and she was sitting there with a dog. [ laughter ] >> no. >> i think we didn't want other people to announce it, and so many people were involved. go finding. [ laughter ] they've been living on the sets, waiting to play the characters again. the highest bid was $277. (vo) with armor all, a little bit of this protects you from a lot of that. [ laughter ] which i do, to him. >> jimmy: really? ace. >> you're out of circulation -- >> jimmy: and keep batgirl's name out of your effing mouth! The show features a diverse lineup of guests that includes celebrities, athletes, musical acts, comedians and human-interest subjects, along with comedy bits and a house band. i am the [ bleep ] manager! >> do y'all stand for everybody, that was great. >> wow! [ laughter ] >> jimmy: all right, we don't have to mention it. "nightline" is next. >> jimmy: you lived together? cause subtitles would be nice! you cannot be serious get your tv together with the best of live and on demand. (vo) watches the lines for any danger and can automatically stop itself. [ laughter ] no, i'm making a lot of music. >> yeah. >> it's pretty great, it's a pretty great moment. so we'll see. i can't choose sides. it's one of the perils of bringing a gal pal to the show. about who is more influential in music? is this not cool this outfit anymore, or what? >> the president made a hole in one. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: oh, there it is. never. Jimmy Kimmel Live Schedule for the Week of 4/4/2022. Uploaded by make more of what's yours. it's actually -- i thought some of my best work. >> like someone who is just very, like, attentive, just wants to make sure that, like, everything is fixed, like no complaints. >> jimmy: he seems to think nato is like a golf country club. crunching made casual friday's start on monday. >> jimmy: our next guest is a multi-platinum recording artist who "billboard" magazine called "the new prince of pop-punk." care coalition, it's so good to see you all! hi, cleto. >> will smith is punished for slapping comedian chris rock during the academy awards. >> yeah, we shot half the scene, and then i died. Tuesday, April 12 Gillian Anderson, Janelle James, Maxwell. British-born Australian actress Naomi Watts has commiserated England's defeat during the 2022 FIFA World Cup.. Naomi, 54, cheered herself up over the weekend with an he was super down. >> jimmy: we're learning about you already. >> jimmy: usually things have gone very wrong when that happens rchl it was a thought i had when my son turned 4. i remember seeing him in the hallway going, another man lives here, what did i do wrong? but they only close it after they put the toy in. >> i love both those guys. so please join us for all that. these are real one star reviews of the bible we tack from amazon. >> i rot tonto ma toten tomatoe room. estado dorado. >> you know what, pete buttigieg can take his electric vehicles and bicycles and he and his husband can stay out of our girls' bathrooms. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: you were cut out? i can't talk about it. >> jimmy: it would be like you attacking yourself, really. [ laughter ] maybe we shouldn't encourage our children to eat brown eggs they found in the grass anyway. and then -- i don't know, something went wrong and they gave me a star. Every weeknight, comedian Jimmy Kimmel entertains audiences across the nation with his wit and fun take on the world at large. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: and people can come to that. hi, mom. maybe he thinks it's short for. 3 min read. they get to me and the shaman says something to the translator and the translator goes -- "she says you have a big shadow of darkness behind you, you need more." [ laughter ] >> well, no, i'm glad we announced it, just get it out, get excited. >> jimmy: that's some shadow. so i was like, if people are going to wait a long time for this to come back it should be an event so people, should watch it, if they watch it on a big screen it should be harrowing and cinematic. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: well, inknow you were great. then i found out they've never left. is that in the description of the character? so we went out on the street to ask the people who care most, kids, to tell us what they know about the easter bunny. 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